I have no idea what it does but I want one

I recognize the compact flashcard, the ram modules, and the CPU, so its gotta be some type of computer or computerized thingy

It appears to be a PC capable of leaving of its own power.

Wonder if it's got wireless... it'd be really funny if someone rooted it and drove it out of the owner's property.

That's awesome. I wonder how you'd cool it though, plus it'd get dusty pretty quickly.

can it turn on a dime?

no, but it shoots faggo retards who spam eternally unfunny catchphrases with pinballs